If you have a partner who is going through menopause, you have likely seen some changes both physically and mentally. From the dreaded hot flashes to a rising and falling libido to a tearful partner, you may be wondering how best to support your partner. What to say and what not to say and how to get through menopause together.
The last thing you want is to stop talking and watch your relationship deteriorate before your very eyes. But with over 60% of divorces Initiated by women between the ages of 40 and 60, menopause can be a difficult time for your marriage for you and your partner. Many men think menopause is something to worry about, but women who have a supportive partner often have a smoother transition through menopause. So here are 10 ways you can support a partner going through menopause.
1. Educate yourself
Learn more about menopause symptoms, understand, and empathize. The more you know about why your partner is feeling hot, a little tearful, and dejected, the better you can talk to and support them. Many women feel completely detached from their lives and loved ones, which means that love and support are more important than ever. By being compassionate and validating your partner’s experiences rather than trying to “correct” them, you will find that your relationship is strengthening during this difficult time.
Common symptoms of menopause are:
- Hot flashes
- Memory loss
- Night sweats
- Low mood and anxiety
- Vaginal dryness from thinning of the vaginal wall
- Reduced sex drive
- Hair thinning
- Weight gain
2. Keep communication open
Avoid resentment towards your partner by keeping lines of communication open so you can learn more about your partner’s needs while tactfully highlighting your own. As important as it is to support your partner, don’t forget to neglect your own emotional needs.
3. Offer support
Your partner is going through it – although they may be more difficult than usual, you know that these are the ever-changing hormones and stress their body is under. Ask your partner what they need, especially if there is a physical or emotional struggle; You’re not a mind reader, so gently ask if there is anything you can do to help. Whether it’s a relaxing bath, making a cup of tea, listening, or shopping for your favorite cookies, these are all ways to show your love and support.
Sometimes all you have to do is ask, so don’t be afraid to ask how you can best support your partner. While emotional support is key, practical help can also alleviate some of the stresses and strains of menopause. Ask if there are specific tasks you can help with when your partner is tired, and maybe offer to do more around the house. That way, you’ll know exactly how to help and take the guesswork out of it.
4. Adjust your expectations
You may be used to having sex several times a week, but with the ever-changing levels of estrogen, your partner’s libido is likely to take a nosedive. Your partner is going through an important milestone in their life, so manage your expectations as they can change monthly, weekly, and even daily. Instead, try other ways to get intimate – cuddling, holding hands, enjoying an intimate dinner – there are many ways you can feel intimate without sex. And if the two of you are in the mood for a romantic night out, your sex doesn’t have to suffer as much as you can Enjoy great sex regardless of menopause.
5. Reduce the friction
This can be both physical and emotional. Add lubrication or a flexible vibrator can aid in arousal and increase blood flow. Adding this to your sexual routine can fundamentally change the physical side of your relationship. While emotional tension can be caused by mood swings and persistent depression, it’s important to realize that fluctuating hormone levels are likely the cause.
6. Do not draw attention to menopausal symptoms
Is there anything worse than having someone point out your bad mood? Aside from being pretty annoying, it can also lead to long-term relationship problems. If your partner feels the need to hide and bury the symptoms, resentment can build up, leading to severed lines of communication. While there can be some symptoms that can make your partner feel self-conscious, such as weight gain and thinning hair, it is best to avoid pointing them out as it doesn’t make anyone feel good.
7. Make them feel great
Be romantic. Bring them flowers for no occasion, make dinner, try a romantic one Date night or even a sensual massage. Your gestures can be as small or large as you like – you know your partner better than anyone; do the things that put a smile on their faces and watch them shine inside out. You know the best way to make her feel valued and boost the feel good hormones she craves.
8. Get the support you need
Just as you don’t understand what it is like to be menopausal, you don’t understand what it is like to be the partner of someone who is menopausal. If you need to let off some steam by speaking to a supportive friend or family member, then do just that. Don’t neglect your own emotional needs by supporting someone else.
It is also important to help your partner find additional support. Whether you are a doctor, therapist, sex therapist, or support group, menopause can create complicated emotions, and a supportive partner is not necessarily the one who carries all of the emotional burden.
9. Getting well together
Small lifestyle changes can be just what your partner needs to ease menopausal symptoms – and the best way to support that and make them feel like they’re not alone is to get on board. Regardless of whether you actually like to be healthy, you can advocate a healthy diet, take them for walks, and help prepare balanced meals. Show your partner that you are there together!
10. Remember, it’s not forever
Menopause can seem endless, but you can find comfort in knowing things will get better. The symptoms will subside, and your partner will eventually feel like himself again. Come out of the other side strengthened by keeping open lines of communication at the heart of your relationship. Menopause has its own agenda – how long the menopause lasts is as unique as your fingerprint. That means you don’t have an end date, but you know that light is at the end of the tunnel.
Don’t be afraid to seek further assistance from a doctor in order to best support your partner through menopause.